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Week 28 – MFRW 52-Week Blog Challenge ~ Blog Hop #MFRWauthor


Week 28: Life Lessons in My Books

Well, folks, this has been an awful week. Last Sunday I had to have my dog put down. She was fourteen. My son got her when she was ten months old. She’s been mine 24/7 for the last seven years. We are all devastated, but she deteriorated rapidly the last two days of her life. I miss her like crazy, and it feels like she’s pressed up against my office chair as I sit at my desk. I still look so I don’t roll into her. I check the floor beside my bed before stepping down. I wrote her into my book, Whispers of Forever, as a tribute because I knew our days together were limited. She’s on the cover, too.

RIP my sweet girl, Kasha.

Mary J McCoy-Dressel, western romance


As if that wasn’t enough, on the same day before we knew we’d be putting her down, my son and daughter-in-law told me they’re moving to Virginia. They now live seven miles from me. My older son lives on the other coast. I’m going to miss him so much. If I’m not crying over the dog, I’m crying over them leaving. Deep breath. I know life goes on. That should be my life lesson.


I wasn’t in the mood to write a post this week but the topic is kind of important. Life lessons? How do I get the point across to readers in my books?

Here’s an example. In my Bull Rider Series, the first book shows that my heroine, Howdy, Ma'am, Bull Rider Series, Mary J McCoy-DresselVelia, is living with an abusive husband. How ironic for her since she is on a plane returning from a funeral for her aunt in Italy who died at her husband’s hands. She left three children behind. Velia has an awakening, and begins her plan of escape and she carries it through.

This is one life lesson I want my readers to get.

No one needs to live in a mental or physical abusive relationship. Do I speak from experience on this topic? Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t. Do I think it’s easy to walk away from an abusive relationship? Hell no. It isn’t. After a while it seems like the normal way of life. That’s all I’ll say about that. Referring to the book and in reality, I wrote a short post about Domestic Abuse.

I’m talking for women though men are abused too in a relationship, but I know most of my readers are women.

Outside of abuse, I want to let readers know through my heroines, they are allowed to be independent and have their own minds and opinions. Through my heroes, I want to show that, sure, they can get mad about something, and maybe not approve, but no matter what, they will respect their heroine, and vice versa in this scenario.

Someone close to me wasn’t allowed this in her life. She had to live under her husband’s thumb to a certain extent. She accepted it because he provided for the family, and she didn’t feel like she deserved to have more than she’d like to have. My mother lived a hellish life with my dad, and he tried the same thing with me growing up. He realized early that I was an independent soul whether he liked it or not. He eventually embraced the idea that I stuck up for myself. I try to relay this message in my books.

Shouldn’t everyone have a right to an opinion in a relationship?  MJ McCoy-Dressel


A friend had turned all finances in their family over to her husband. He gave her a small allowance each month. I mean small, and some of the income had been her earnings. She scrimped for months to buy an outfit when her husband didn’t have to ask permission to buy a new…anything. How is this fair? Fairness isn’t an option. Is it? Am I wrong? Maybe it’s my own independent mind thinking love should be fair.


I hope the life lessons in my books show that a person should expect to be treated with:

  • Respect.
  • Fairness.
  • As an equal.
  • Without fear of being slapped or worse.
  • Without FEAR.
  • You have a choice.
  • Independence isn’t a bad thing.
  • Love.

Thanks for reading today.

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Week 28 – MFRW 52-Week Blog Challenge Participants #MFRWauthor

Participants, I’ll do my best to get around to your blogs. If nothing else, I will share your posts. Thanks for understanding.